A comprehensive list of every item in the game, minus how to get them to avoid total spoilers!
Food & Potions
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Food is used for two purposes: You can donate it back to the Cultist HQ or use it yourself to buy things at various shops throughout the game. Anything you donate during Vanilla Mode will carry over from game to game, and can be used at the start of an Old School mode game at a special shop, “Cultists R Us”. This place features many powerful and unique items not found in the normal game.
NOTE: All food values below are doubled during Old School mode.
Apple- Worth 1 food point. It’s an apple. If you’ve never heard of these before it’s time to get out more.
Meat- This is also worth 1 food point. Meat is special in this game because it only comes from defeated enemies on occasion. Meat will only drop during a Vanilla Mode game though, so keep that in mind.
Banana- Worth 2 food points. That’s twice as good as an apple, of course.
Watermelon- A tasty summer’s snack or way too expensive winter snack. Worth 4 food points when grabbed.
Cheese- This makes anything taste better. On the rare-ish side but worth a hefty 6 food points each.
Ice Cream- Only found in really cold places, it’s worth 8 food points a pop.
Eggs- Did you know you can even raid bird nests and steal their unborn babies?? Well you can! These are worth 5 food points each.
Pie- A freshly-baked pie, somehow still steaming after being out in a cold castle for years. Worth 10 whole food points!
Roasted Chicken- The best food item of all time, worth a whopping 25 food points. These are usually very hard to get to or find!
Small Potion– It’s just like a potion… only smaller! These will drop from defeated enemies, or broken vases and candles. Each will restore a small amount of random HP. It’s important to note though that they’ll only drop from enemies on Vanilla Mode. Old School mode is right out!
Large Potion– When a small potion’s already been mentioned, you knew this was coming next. It’s large and blue. Grabbing it will increase Smitty’s maximum HP by 5 points permanently. These are scattered all around and will really help you survive long enough to defeat the forces of Fatass!
Purple Potion– These are much more rare, and flash all crazy-like. Grabbing one of these increases your maximum HP by 10 points. These are always going to be either in places that are hard to find or hard to get to.
Weapons
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Fist / No Weapon- Damage 1. Your beginning weapon is none other than your piddly boney fist. As you may imagine, this is pretty terrible vs the forces of evil. This is immediately replaced by the first weapon you pick up or buy, and once replaced is never mentioned ever again. Thank god!
Sword- Damage Range 1-4. A basic soldier’s sword that occasionally delivers the rare critical hit. Not too shabby and certainly better than your bare fists.
Whip- Damage Range 2-3. The preferred weapon of guys named Simon and Richter, it has a very long reach. It’s incredibly fast too. You’ll probably end up using this for a good portion of the early game if I had to guess.
Torch- Damage 2, Fire element. A big stick soaked in oil you can burn things with. The torch is very versatile and extremely useful to any adventurer worth his skull. Equipping it will illuminate any darkness area and allow Smitty to see much better than before. Big bushes in your way? Try burning them with a torch, then they won’t be! Many enemies are surprisingly weak to fire and will take much more damage when hit with this thing. Lastly… don’t get it wet because it won’t work!
Axe- Damage Range 3-5. Swung in an overhead arc, be the next guy on the block to be mistaken for AHNULD’s Conan the Barbarian. A nice, strong weapon with a useful moveset. Who could ask for anything more?!
Spear- Damage Range 4-6, Two-handed. One of the big weapons that will require both of Smitty’s hands to use properly. (PSSST! That means you won’t be able to block with any shield you happen to have.) It’s specifically made for an upward thrust attack and deals huge damage to any flying enemies you may come across.
Cleaver- Damage Range 1-3… Or IS it? A mysterious hidden weapon that belongs to the Cultists. It’s been used for so many Tuesday night rituals it’s now practically dripping with blood. To use it, keep hitting enemies to fill the little blood gauge next to its icon on the main screen. When it’s full, the weapon will start to flash red. That next attack will hit for 15-17 base damage. BOOM!!
Dagger- Damage Range 1-2. Every thief and murderer has one of these for safekeeping. Attacking enemies from the rear will cause a critical hit roughly a third of the time. Combine it with a red ring and the barbell and wreck basically everything in sight.
Izo’s Razor- Damage Range 8-10, Cursed. The deadly sword with a black blade. Extremely fast and strong but has this teensie curse where it’ll sometimes completely heal the enemy instead. Whoopsie!
Golden Axe- Damage Range 1-7, Lucky. An upgraded battle axe that exchanges some low-end damage for the LUCK O’ THE IRISH. Enemies and breakables will drop small potions at an increased rate.
NOTE: Not affiliated with the old arcade game of the same name, please don’t sue me.
N00b Rod- Damage Range 1-4, Magic. The most basic of beginner’s magic wands. The n00b rod is good to show off to your friends, provided you don’t accidentally fry them when it inadvertently fires in the wrong direction!
Magic Wand- Damage Range 3-10, Magic. A much more reliable wand, it fires 3 orange projectiles down and away from you over a short distance. Can be devastating to enemies on the ground below you!
Cactus Rod- Damage Range 4-6, Magic. Unusual for a magic item, instead of shooting projectiles it instead summons a green shield that spins around you for a short time. During this time you’re unable to move, however the shield can injure enemies and block projectiles alike.
Zweihander- Damage Range 5-12, Two-handed. The other two-handed weapon, this is a giant sword straight outta’ ye olde Germany. Like the Spear, you won’t be able to block with any shield you own while this is equipped. Unlike the Spear this thing completely dominates armored enemies, and will smash right through their shielded defenses!
Icebrand- Damage Range 1-5, Ice element. It’s a pretty COOL weapon, alright. Striking some minor enemies like bats and snakes will cause them to freeze into icecubes. These icecubes can then be stood upon to reach new heights. This opens up all sorts of new exploration possibilities, but WHERE IS THIS DAMN THING??
Mace- Damage Range 2-5, Holy weaponry. This extremely fast weapon has a ton of pop to it vs. the game’s boss monsters, and will always critically hit against them.
NOTE: Old School mode only- must first be unlocked in Vanilla to acquire!
Magic Rod- Damage Range 1-4, Magic. The king of all weapons if you enjoy your Metroidvania games with a hint of sequence breaking, its blue projectiles can fire upwards and away from you and even goes through walls. Especially great and hitting many switches earlier than I ever intended them to normally. Go nuts!
Flail: Damage Range 2-9. Ye olde ball and chain! Very strong but super slow, it’s more useful for its secondary power which is smashing up rock piles and cave ins.
Devil Axe- Damage Range 6-13, Cursed. One of the most powerful weapons in the entire game also comes with the most powerful curse: Holding it will drain 3 HP per tick instead of 1 HP per tick during Old School Mode. To make up for it, it has a very high critical hit rate to go with that sick damage. What will you do????
NOTE: Old School mode only- must first be unlocked in Vanilla to acquire!
El Zappo- Damage Range 1-5, Lightning element. A far better version of your regular whip, it deals super high damage when wet (aka RIP fish and other water enemies). Better still, you can use its power to charge up any dead batteries you may find. You know, in the castle. Made in the stone age…
NOTE: If for some reason you didn’t pick up the regular whip, it will become unavailable once you get El Zappo. If you did already get the whip, El Zappo will replace it. Sorry man, I only have room for 15 weapons at once!
Grave Spout- Damage Range 6-13, Magic. The last and greatest of all magic wands, it has an attack similar to the Necromancer boss. Shoots 5 red magic projectiles out in a wide spread. Very hard to get, but well worth it!
Gigaboosh- Damage 3, Acid element. Is acid even an element? Well for all intents and purposes, that’s what we’ll call it here. A super powerful and expensive knife that is basically this game’s Crissaegrim (From Castlevania: Symphony of the Night- go play it!) Players can continuously mash the attack button and Smitty can continue to walk or run while you do it. It also splashes acid puddles all around, which can fly off and injure or kill your enemies too. The catch? Sometimes you’ll also get hurt by the acid.
NOTE: Old School mode only- must first be unlocked in Vanilla to acquire!
Armor
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Helmet- Reduces any damage taken by 5%. Its best property though is its ability to break through cracked blocks. You can spot these blocks a mile away, as they also have a helmet picture on them.
Old Helmet- Just like the regular helmet.. only older! And.. redder?? Reduces damage taken by 10% and also lets you break those cracked blocks mentioned above. Best of all, it allows you to see in complete darkness without need to equipping a torch (works in water too!)
Plate Armor- Made of blue steel this protects your body to the tune of 20% damage reduction across the board. Not bad!
Harmour- Red magical armor that protects you vs. 25% of all damage types. Additionally you’ll kill many minor enemies if you dash into them while wearing it!
Shield- The basic solider’s shield. It’ll reduce all damage taken by 10%. You can block all non-magical projectiles with it by pressing (down). A blocked projectile deals no damage at all.
Knight Shield- Hands down one of the best items in the game. This red puppy protects you vs. 15% of all incoming damage and can even block magical projectiles from wizards, butterflies, and the Necromancer!
Other Items
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Key- A regular key, and almost certainly the first misc item you’re going to get. With it, you can open any regular (wooden) door you come across. Surprisingly good. Don’t sleep on the key!
Master Key- An upgraded magical key that’s all green and flashy. Opens any door at all, including those rare doors that are also all green and flashy. This is a tough item to get a hold of.
Combat Boots- Even though I wore combat boots all through my 20s and can tell you there’s no way these will ever make you jump higher, that’s exactly what these video game versions will do. Realism ahoy! Press (up) before you jump to do a high jump and reach new places.
Dash Ability- Neither weapon nor item, it’s a green arrow that unlocks you being able to run really fast. Dashing is very important if you want to clear long jumps, and running over sharp spikes negates any damage they’d normally do to you. Press and hold either the X or SHIFT key while moving left or right to dash. If you’re using a gamepad this can be done by holding down the B button instead (on an Xbox 360 controller).
Necklace- Hidden item of an unearthly power, killing enemies as quick as humanly possible will restore your HP a small bit. Plus it looks just like you, Smitty! Especially nice in Old School mode, where your HP is constantly ticking away as it is and there’s no other way to heal up.
Barbell- Grabbing this makes you all mighty and such. Increases all your critical hit damage by a sizable amount. How much exactly? Sizable!
Frog- A tiny amphibian whose race has been in decline since the 1980s. Ahhh, I remember when ponds used to be filled with these guys. And now it’s all sh!t. How depressing! Anyhow, holding this makes your MP meter recharge much faster while using magic wands.
Anger Agate- The bright orange gemstone that fuels bright red skeletons. Upon taking any damage there’s a chance you’ll become very p!ssed off for a very short time. During this period you’ll deal +5 damage, regardless of whatever weapon or wand you’re using. Hooray for losing your cool!
Red Ring- One of three magic rings, this one increases damage done through normal weapons by +2. Magic and elemental / cursed / holy weapons need not apply!
Red Ring Plus- The stronger version of the red ring, all normal weapon damage is increased to +4.
Purple Ring- The second magic ring. This will increase all magic damage done from your wands by +5. Can be very deadly when paired with the right wizard’s stick.
Blue Ring- The final ring of course. Only available in Old School mode (and after you’ve unlocked it) this will dramatically slow Smitty’s HP drain during that mode. Your HP numbers will turn blue to let you know you’re under its effect.
Nikki’s Halo- A pendant that provides immense elemental protection. Specifically, it allows you to walk through raging floor infernos and protects you vs. the rare acid splash.
