Struggling: All Achievements Guide

I will, though, mention where the hat achievements will unlock if you get them all in order in one playthrough. Also note that you have to actually put them on your head for the achievement to count, and even that is HARD sometimes.

There is one general achievement that I will NOT cover, since it’s humanely impossible to obtain: finish the game without dying once.

Professional Struggle
Complete the campaign without dying once.

I’m 100% sure everyone who got this on Steam actually used some kind of cheat, and I dare anyone to show a credible video in which they manage this feat. Seriously, I’d very happy to watch you prove me wrong.

Besides this one, the next achievements are going to be shown more or less in the order you obtain them. Good luck, this game is HARD!

It’s okay to cry.
Die for the first time.

I wonder if you can spend 5 minutes in the game without obtaining it. I died almost 300 times on my playthrough, so don’t worry, you WILL die. A LOT.

Classy!
Collect your first hat.

One is easy, but getting them all makes the game a lot harder. Good luck again!

DJ Troy
Tell the dancers about your new mixtape.

This is at the Nerd’s Nightclub. Once you get on top of the party, grab the mic and scream into it (using the suicide button).

Fashionable
Collect 3 hats.

The third hat is located in the Lethal Specimens Facility.

Mission Impossible
Carefully pass the pod room.

Still in the Lethal Specimens Facility, but in a different room, you’ll come across a button.

DON’T PRESS IT! What I did is grab the button pole close to the button with one arm, and then HURL myself OVER the button. You’ll likely press the button lightly, but not enough to activate it. Keep crossing the room, and this will unlock on the next checkpoint.
Note that it may be possible that this achievement unlocks even if you do hit the button and trigger the alarm, but manages to cross the entire room without being hit (not even in the arms? or maybe just don’t die in this section? I can’t test it), which is very hard. Do yourself a favor and avoid triggering the alarm. If you do, you can try going to Troy’s Lair and then return to the game. If that doesn’t work (ie, the alarm is still on), you’ll have to restart the level, unfortunately.

Helping hand
Make the scientist in need fall.

When you see the scientist hanging from the ledge, grab her hat and let her fall to their death.

Fleshy infiltration
Get to the abandoned meeting room.

When you get into the elevator, it will stop at the second floor. When you’re done and ready to move on, close the door and press the button. As soon as the elevator starts moving, press the button again (but just once more, don’t press it too many times) to force it to stop at 3F. If you fail, scream yourself to death and try again from the previous checkpoint.
Then climb the door and go up the vent.
To go through the vent until you reach the abandoned meeting room.

Elevator repair monster
Destroy the elevator.

Remember when I told you not to press the button too many times? Now you do that, while it’s moving. If done right, the elevator will break and speed up to the top. If you fail, scream yourself to death and try again from the previous checkpoint.

Prophet of the Swarm
Get bitten by three rats at the same time.

Self-explanatory. Note that they get off if you shake too hard, and they last longer on your head than on your arms. I got it in the area below the vent that leads to the plunger hat, but I think there’s a better spot further in case you’re having trouble here. I’ll point it out again when the time comes.

Call in the Paparazzi
Collect 10 hats.

The 10th hat overall and last one in the Laboratory is located in the large storage you fall in while running away from our friends below.

These rats are chasing.
Escape the rat swarm.

Story-related, and thus unmissable.

Ecologist
Only use one plug to get to Amadeus.

This is in the area called On the Firstborn’s Steps. You’ll eventually get to this area with a switch:
First, make sure you get the hat here by pressing the switch multiple times. Then go back to Troy’s Lair and back into the game. This time, make sure you press the button ONLY ONCE (going through the ceiling makes it easier to not hit it twice) Then you’ll get the cork and use it to plug the first pipe. Move past that pipe, then grab the same cork from the first pipe in order to plug the second one (it might be easier from the ceiling again).
If you mess up, go back to Troy’s Lair, and then back into the game, and make sure you don’t press the button more than once this time again.
You can uncork the third pipe normally to move forward, and when you’re falling the achievement will pop.

Fully treat Amadeus
Fully damage Amadeus.

During the boss fight, before defeating the boss, make sure you break all its teeth and make its large left-most (from screen perspective) eye sore, bright red. For the eye, you just have to hit it straight. For the teeth, you have to attack from below, through the hole on its chin. See the image.

Chemotherapist
Cure Amadeus.

Story-related, and thus unmissable.

You have peaked.
Create an arm circle.

When you unlock the Remote Arms power, detach both arms and make one grab the other.

Headpiece Scavenger
Collect 15 hats.

The 15th hat is located at the Lombric Predatorial Site.

King Stealer
Steal the Rat King’s crown.

In the Mechanical Bone Crushers, after going up with the help of the crane, you’ll reach this platform:
Swing until you can grab the ceiling.
Then enter the pipe shown above.
You’ll enter “His Highness’ Nest”. Here’s a great opportunity (and the last, I think) to get Prophet of the Swarm, mentioned on the previous section, especially on that first turn going up (“grab” one or 2 rats, then fall back down to get the remaining).
But enough of that achievement, let’s go back to King Stealer. Make your way through the path until you get to the rat king, and steal his crown by placing it on your head. If you drop it, die on purpose and try again. You’ll need to retrace your steps to the entrance of the nest while running away from vicious rats, and you’ll need the crown on your head when you leave the nest.
If you die before getting to the rat king, there’s a chance you’ll trigger a bug in which you’ll respawn outside the nest, right after that wooden platform, and you won’t be able to return to it. But don’t lose hope, and keep on moving over the cogs, since you’ll be able to climb the ceiling at the end of the room and return to the rat nest.

Epic Stylist
Collect 20 hats.

The 20th hat in the game, last of this level, is located in the Lab Interns Prototyping Area.

Helping arms
Escape the acid flooding cave.

Story-related, and thus unmissable.

Aquatic Abomination
Listen to the water theme song.

Right at the start, after the first two geysers, there’s a small body of water, your first opportunity for obtaining this achievement.
Just relax, let go of the controller (you should be using one) and let your sore fingers rest for a while. You don’t need to grab the floor, your arms’ weight will serve as anchor and keep you underwater. You’ll have to listen to the whole theme, which lasts 6 minutes and 33 seconds. You can also get this at any body of water, but you’ll only find those in the Canyon.

Double tap.
Push your luck in the saloon.

After being kicked from the saloon, be stubborn and climb back to get kicked again.

Sun’s out, guns out.
Reach the secret tanning spot.

Right after meeting the climbers, you’ll take a ride in a geyser and reach a rope.
Get a lot of momentum and throw yourself to the left, and be ready to grab when you hit something. You should reach the area below, which will unlock the achievement.

Clutch.
Escape the crashing plane.

Story-related, and thus unmissable.

There’s an achievement for dating each of the 3 heads (+1, see the end of the section for details), and another one for dating all 4 of them.

While you CAN please all three heads at the same time, you have to pick one (provided they are happy with you), and you’ll only unlock the achievement for the chosen sibling.

Currently, to replay the dating sim you have to go through the canyon all over again. Ouch. But devs have mentioned they plan on, maybe early 2021, including some sort of practice mode that will allow you to pick that part more directly. Or something like that.

NOTE: I’ve played this in Portuguese, so the questions and answers might be a bit off. I’ll just give you the general idea. Also, the position of the answers seem to be random.

At each stage, you’ll have to react to the heads by picking two answers, one from a set of three for each of your own heads. These sets of 3 each have 1 positive (P), 1 neutral (0), and 1 negative (N) answer. The overall result depends on both answers combined:

• PP or P0 >> Positive
• PN or 00 >> Neutral
• 0N or NN >> Negative

Obviously, if you want to date them, you should go for positive results always.

But let’s deal with each head now…

I like France.
Date Paris.

Choosing First

She’ll say it’s the start of a beautiful story.

Achilles:

• (P) Siblings are great.
• (0) I’m Achilles.
• (N) I love you.

Hector:

• (P) I think so, yeah.
• (0) I’m Hector.
• (N) Is Paris French?

Part One, Question 1 (you get only either A or B)

A: It rains in our date, what then?

Achilles:

• (P) Keep going, it’s romantic.
• (0) Find shelter.
• (N) Go home watch TV.

Hector:

• (P) Kiss in the rain.
• (0) Umbrella.
• (N) The date is ruined, so whatever.

B: Favorite candy?

Achilles:

• (P) Chocolate.
• (0) Healthy.
• (N) Same as yours.

Hector:

• (P) Hot chocolate.
• (0) Gummy bears.
• (N) I don’t eat anything.

Part One, Question 2 (you get only either A or B)

A: I hate goats.

Achilles:

• (P) They’re not evil.
• (0) Too many legs.
• (N) They’re dangerous.

Hector:

• (P) I met one and I’ve survived.
• (0) Trust your guts.
• (N) Goats are awful, you’re right.

B: Travel the world…

Achilles:

• (P) Fix the airplane that crashed.
• (0) Go to France.
• (N) Nah, it’s dangerous.

Hector:

• (P) Go to the moon.
• (0) Invite to our pilgrimage.
• (N) I’ve seen too much of the world already.

Part Two (you get only either A or B)

A: I’m not fit to be a parent.

Achilles:

• (P) You are a good parent for your siblings.
• (0) Being a parent is hard.
• (N) Anatomy doesn’t work like this.

Hector:

• (P) Where there’s a will, there’s a way.
• (0) You’d be great with children.
• (N) I’m not ready to be a father.

B: I love my siblings.

Achilles:

• (P) Tell them you love them.
• (0) Ulysses lies?
• (N) Too much information…

Hector:

• (P) I enjoy talking to them.
• (0) Bingo.
• (N) That’s nice to know.

Part Three

I wanna see my siblings smiling.

Achilles:

• (P) They’re lucky to have you.
• (0) I’ve made up my mind already.
• (N) I’ll decide it by tossing a coin.

Hector:

• (P) I’m glad we met, regardless.
• (0) I love your sister.
• (N) I love your brother.

Part Four

If you did everything right, pick Paris.

A box full of joy!
Date Pandora.

Choosing First

Something about brains…

Achilles:

• (P) I’m the brains, Hector is the brawn.
• (0) Only logical choice.
• (N) You were wrong, we’re smart.

Hector:

• (P) Achilles is the brains.
• (0) I’m following Achilles’ lead.
• (N) E=MC whatever.

Part One, Question 1 (you get only either A or B)

A: How long until her Researcher cats will take her position?

Achilles:

• (P) No idea, they work hard.
• (0) Shocked that the cats are researchers.
• (N) Makes fun of her position, possibly a pun with “head”.

Hector:

• (P) Not that stimulating.
• (0) Mentions the Institution above.
• (N) What are you even saying?

B: Travel to a world with different laws. Where?

Achilles:

• (P) Peaceful, tastes like coffee.
• (0) Cat, democracy, chainsaws.
• (N) Monarchy, rats.

Hector:

• (P) World without lies.
• (0) Only music.
• (N) Rap battles, caste system.

Part One, Question 2 (you get only either A or B)

A: Says Pi digits.

Achilles:

• (P) You should’ve stopped earlier.
• (0) Keep going!
• (N) What the nerd is that?

Hector:

• (P) Not attractive.
• (0) Says more digits.
• (N) PLEASE STOP!

B: Sudoku champion in Canada.

Achilles:

• (P) Why are you telling me this?
• (0) Only one country?
• (N) Confuses sudoku with tic-tac-toe.

Hector:

• (P) I’m intimidated by your smarts.
• (0) I like two numbers, zero and one.
• (N) Don’t care for sudoku.

Part Two (you get only either A or B)

A: How is Amadeus?

Achilles:

• (P) Explosion.
• (0) Trouble, but fine.
• (N) Nice voice.

Hector:

• (P) Cave is full of acid.
• (0) Cave has rat problem.
• (N) Don’t worry.

B: I love boxes.

Achilles:

• (P) I wear a box as hat.
• (0) Hard to find one big enough.
• (N) I got chased by rats.

Hector:

• (P) I love hats just the same.
• (0) I find that most curious.
• (N) I love cars.

Part Three

I wish I was stupid.

Achilles:

• (P) I want to help you.
• (0) It’s not a bad thing to be smart.
• (N) Thanks to your brain, you’re better than most.

Hector:

• (P) Nobody knows how to interact properly.
• (0) I’m stupid, it’s not great.
• (N) Paris is dumb, so ask her.

Part Four

If you did everything right, pick Pandora.

Romantic wild ride!
Date Ulysses.

Choosing First

I’m gonna tell you about myself.

Achilles:

• (P) Tell me a story.
• (0) The other two seem boring.
• (N) I’ll give you an advantage.

Hector:

• (P) Great energy!
• (0) I’m listening.
• (N) Hm.

Part One, Question 1 (you get only either A or B)

A: Where will you take me when I win?

Achilles:

• (P) Picnic.
• (0) Skydiving.
• (N) Library.

Hector:

• (P) Fireworks festival.
• (0) Restaurant.
• (N) Chess.

B: Are you travelers?

Achilles:

• (P) Adventure.
• (0) Pilgrimage to become whole.
• (N) Help us, we fell down.

Hector:

• (P) We want to meet people like you.
• (0) We’re just passing by.
• (N) I really don’t know.

Part One, Question 2 (you get only either A or B)

A: I put the goats there, did you have fun?

Achilles:

• (P) A lot of fun, funny sounds.
• (0) Oh, it was you?
• (N) You put those poor goats in danger.

Hector:

• (P) I love danger.
• (0) One was crushed.
• (N) You don’t have legs.

B: I fooled the climbers, I like to hear them falling.

Achilles:

• (P) Some pun with climbers breaking their bones.
• (0) How did you get their addresses?
• (N) That’s not funny, you have serious issues.

Hector:

• (P) They’re all nerds hahaha!
• (0) Can they actually climb for one week?
• (N) What if they do find a treasure? Joke’s on you.

Part Two (you get only either A or B)

A: Tells about the most dangerous he’s done.

Achilles:

• (P) That’s crazy!
• (0) That’s against the laws of physics.
• (N) But is your partner dead?

Hector:

• (P) Awesome, you’ve risked your life to win the race.
• (0) How do you drive without feet?
• (N) Most dangerous doesn’t mean most stupid.

B: Tells about when he lost.

Achilles:

• (P) Sword? You deserved it.
• (0) Pandora tricked you.
• (N) You can’t win all the time, especially mental stuff.

Hector:

• (P) That sucks.
• (0) Sudoku is not dangerous.
• (N) I’m sorry for you.

Part Three

The moon talks to me.

Achilles:

• (P) I believe you.
• (0) The truth is important, but okay.
• (N) You have lying issues.

Hector:

• (P) You’re good.
• (0) Boagrius?
• (N) I’m dating the moon.

Part Four

If you did everything right, pick Ulysses.

Escape is the only option…
Date Patroclus.

Patroclus is the fourth hidden head. To get it to date you, you have to be rejected by all three “main” heads. After that, it doesn’t matter what you choose, you’ll always be accepted. The idea is getting only negative or neutral reactions to be rejected. Aim for negative reactions to be on the safe side.

Here’s a rundown of only the NEGATIVE answers for the other heads:

Choosing First

Paris: I love you. / Is Paris French?

Pandora: You were wrong, we’re smart. / E=MC whatever.

Ulysses: I’ll give you an advantage. / Hm.

Part One, Question 1 (you get only either A or B)

Paris:
(A) It rains in our date, what then? >>> Go home watch TV. / The date is ruined, so whatever.
(B) Favorite candy? >>> Same as yours. / I don’t eat anything.

Pandora:
(A) How long until her Researcher cats will take her position? >>> Makes fun of her position, possibly a pun with “head”. / What are you even saying?
(B) Travel to a world with different laws. Where? >>> Monarchy, rats. / Rap battles, caste system.

Ulysses:
(A) Where will you take me when I win? >>> Library. / Chess.
(B) Are you travelers? >>> Help us, we fell down. / I really don’t know.

Part One, Question 2 (you get only either A or B)

Paris:
(A) I hate goats. >>> They’re dangerous. / Goats are awful, you’re right.
(B) Travel the world… >>> Nah, it’s dangerous. / I’ve seen too much of the world already.

Pandora:
(A) Says Pi digits. >>> What the nerd is that? / PLEASE STOP!
(B) Sudoku champion in Canada. >>> Confuses sudoku with tic-tac-toe. / Don’t care for sudoku.

Ulysses:
(A) I put the goats there, did you have fun? >>> You put those poor goats in danger. / You don’t have legs.
(B) I fooled the climbers, I like to hear them falling. >>> That’s not funny, you have serious issues. / What if they do find a treasure? Joke’s on you.

Part Two (you get only either A or B)

Paris:
(A) I’m not fit to be a parent. >>> Anatomy doesn’t work like this. / I’m not ready to be a father.
(B) I love my siblings. >>> Too much information… / That’s nice to know.

Pandora:
(A) How is Amadeus? >>> Nice voice. / Don’t worry.
(B) I love boxes. >>> I got chased by rats. / I love cars.

Ulysses:
(A) Tells about the most dangerous he’s done. >>> But is your partner dead? / Most dangerous doesn’t mean most stupid.
(B) Tells about when he lost. >>> You can’t win all the time, especially mental stuff. / I’m sorry for you.

Part Three

Paris: I’ll decide it by tossing a coin. / I love your brother.

Pandora: Thanks to your brain, you’re better than most. / Paris is dumb, so ask her.

Ulysses: You have lying issues. / I’m dating the moon.

Part Four

If you did everything right, you won’t have a choice in the matter, and will be forced to date Patroclus.

Super Seducer
Date each of Agamemnus’ Heads

Phew! After dating all four heads, you’ll unlock this one. The dating sim is easy, but getting there is really hard…

This area is still officially part of the Canyon, but I had to break the guide for the Agamemnus part.

Ancient romance
Open the door of the secret tomb.

In the Muscle Temple, you’ll see two statues with flesh nodes for hands.
[IMAGE SOON]
Detach both arms and attach them to each of the flesh nodes. Then, make both your arms hold hands.
[IMAGE SOON]

Mad Hatter
Collect 30 hats.

Right after some stairs with spike balls shooting up and a spear shooting diagonally, AND a flesh boulder on the way up, you’ll find the 30th hat in the game, last one in the Canyon area.

Psychedelic flying bait.
Get baited, son.

Enter the fake checkpoint. Note that it has black bat wings instead of the white feather wings.
Also, you’ll die and return to the previous checkpoint. 🙂

Almost there…
Collect 38 hats.

Right at the start of the Pre Alpha Level Design, you’ll find the second-to-last hat in the game…

Headgear Collector
Collect all the hats.

… and further in the same Pre Alpha Level Design you’ll find the last hat. Phew!

Awww man, here we go again.
Start a second playthrough.

After watching the credits and going back to the main menu, load your game and from Troy’s Lair pick the Stage Selector, and then pick the Laboratory.